Apprendre D’elle…or What We Can All Learn from Koko K.

Wifeys & Gentlemen,

I know we’re likely all sick of hearing about this, but I wasn’t able to comment the last time this went down and we might not get another chance (unless she takes him back)! If any of you are not aware, a couple weeks ago, news broke that Trashy-Tristan-Thompson, now ex-boyfriend and baby-daddy to the beautiful Khloe Kardashian, was rumored to be cheating (again).

*Cue deep exhale and eyeroll*

This time, however, the plot was a little thicker as accusations swirled that his latest side piece was none other than Jordyn Woods, Kylie Jenner’s live in bestie and a fixture in the Kardashian/Jenner home. In all honesty, I’m not here to pick a side or tell you why you should be #TeamJordyn or #TeamKhloe. I don’t know either of these women and and I am not on anyone’s team.

While I do have my own thoughts on the way Jordyn has been treated and the problematic actions of the Kardashian/Jenner clan as a whole, I don’t feel like it’s my job or my place to judge. I do, however, feel like it’s my job to find the lessons that the rest of us can take away from this misfortune.

Indulge me, if you will. I try to be the kind of person to find the lesson in every heartbreak. That’s how you move on and glow up!

Money cannot buy happiness.

I know. I hate this phrase too, but hear me out. While money does make things A LOT easier and eliminates a host of problems the average american must face (debt, rent, bills, having a 9-5, etc..) if there is anything we have learned from Khloe (and this family overall), no amount of money can secure love, happiness, and stability in your life. I mean, Khloe has everything she could ever want! Why is it so hard for her to find lasting love? I’d wager to guess that she has a lot of issues with her own self-esteem. I think she’s harbored a lot of past trauma and hurt that she hasn’t had a chance to fully come to terms with. I think she seeks validation and confirmation of her value in the arms of someone else. No amount of money can fix that (unless you’re spending it on therapy).

Looks & sex are not enough.

Why does every young adult think that sex and attractiveness are enough to keep a relationship together? I wrote a blog back in January about how fleeting looks can be, but I briefly want to note here that: 🗣YOUR SEXUAL ABILITY (STELLAR AS YOU THINK IT MAY BE) IS NOT ENOUGH TO KEEP YOUR MAN/WOMAN/OTHER FROM STRAYING. 🗣 Do you think every person your partner is cheating with is great in bed? Do you think every person your partner is cheating with is going to be better looking than you?Tiger Woods taught us that lesson years ago. Stop acting like being good at sex or being a hottie is going to keep a trash person from acting like trash!

Be careful who you allow into your inner circle.

Again, I’m not here to pick teams or sway anyone to one “side” or another. I genuinely hope that Khloe and Jordyn can find some healing and forgiveness in the future and get back to a place of love and understanding. However, I think this situation can teach us to be careful about who we allow into our lives and what kind of influence our ‘friends’ and ‘family’ can have. Don’t get me wrong, people are good manipulators. You can have a relationship with someone for years and find out they’ve stabbed you in the back! But it’s still important to pay attention and notice the way the people you let into your life behave. Are you friends often jealous of you or your success? Do they stop to ask you how you’re doing or how you feel? Do they tend to hang around during bad times but are nowhere to be found when things are good? Do they have a pattern of treating other people like they are disposable or have they shown evidence of turning on other friends when things get rocky?

Don’t ignore the signs.

Easier said than done, I know, but when you are presented with red flags, don’t ignore them! I hate to point out the obvious and I am not trying to victim blame in any way, but Khloe should have believed Trashy-Tristan-Thompson the first time he showed her the kind of man he was. People can interpret this “first time” however they choose. Maybe the first time was when she initially started dating him, knowing he had  just ended his relationship with another girl in her 3rd trimester of pregnancy? Maybe the first time was when he was caught with other women in his hotel room during her 3rd trimester of pregnancy? Either way; when people show you who they are, believe them! This goes beyond the relationship you might have with your partner. If a friend shows you who they are in a moment where it counts, believe what they are showing you. Watch out for the ones who like to say people are their family or best friends one day and post petty shade on social media about them the next.

You are loved; there are people in your corner.

Most of us will never experience the type of public scandal and humiliation that happens to the Kardashians or Jordyn Woods (thank goodness). Still, going through a breakup or finding out your loved one has been dishonest with you is so tough! Making mistakes that change the course of your life is so tough. It can be easy to feel like you have nothing and the universe has cast you aside.

You’re wrong!

You are loved. People care about you. People want to see you succeed and come out swinging. Lean on those who love you the most and let them help you. While I don’t agree with the bullying and the idiocy on social media, Khloe is very lucky to have family and friends that love her so dearly that they’re willing to stick up for her. Jordyn is lucky that she is reminded of her worth by people who have known her from time. Build your support network and never let them go.

There is no shame in hurting and healing. You don’t owe anyone happiness or strength.

You don’t have to prove to the world how “okay” you are when something embarrassing or hurtful happens to you. You don’t have to bust your ass to build a ‘revenge body’ or dress up everyday. You don’t have to feel the need to share your story repeatedly or try to turn your pain into teachable moments for the world to digest. Sometimes, it’s okay to step back and put yourself and your health first. I hate it when celebrities go through something crazy and traumatic but still feel the need to post perfect selfies and quotes about how it’s always darkest before the dawn! I mean, I get it. You have a brand and an image to uphold. You want your fans and followers to know you’re okay. But wouldn’t it be more helpful for us to know you’re human? Wouldn’t it be more meaningful to let people know you’re not always perfect and okay all the time; that you’re fallible and capable of making mistakes? Take time to heal and let others know you’re struggling. It’s okay. It reminds the world that we’re human and we have needs.

Mind the business that pays you.

If you were to go on Youtube, Twitter, or Instagram right now, you’d find hundreds of thousands of opinions on this whole situation. Some are bashing Jordyn and telling her to kill herself (super uncool). Some are bashing Khloe and slut-shaming the entire Jenner/Kardashian gang (less uncool, but still uncool). Some are making funny memes and jokes that drag the entire lot of em (slightly uncool, but damn funny). Everyone has an opinion and that’s fine.  But in reality, this kind of stuff has no real effect on our lives (or it shouldn’t). I’m not going to sit here and say not to follow the drama or get as much of the tea as you can. I LIVE for celebrity gossip. I am the go-to-girl for my friends and family when they want to know the dirt! I love it. I do. But I also have perspective. I know a lot of what we are shown is what they want us to see. A lot of it is for publicity and money. Don’t get so caught up in the fantasy life of others that you forget to create your own magic for yourself. Mind your business. Handle your home and family. Wake up, grind, and get this bread (that phrase always cracks me up).

Well, that’s my very long 2 cents on this whole thing. What about you guys? Do you think there is anything valuable we can learn from celebrity gossip? Do you have a strong opinion on this particular situation that you feel should be addressed?

Let me know in the comments!

Remember, it’s women’s history month! Let’s all try to be respectful of these women and supportive on the wonderful women in our lives.

Until Next Time,

Carry on Wifeys!


Mrs. Renai

🙂 ❤

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