From the Mouths of Men

Wifeys & Gentlemen,

Have you missed me as much as I’ve missed you? I hope so! I know it’s been a while since my last post, but fear not! In these last few weeks before I go into labor (what?!), I’ve got some content planned out to make sure I’m giving you guys my best before I take a maternity hiatus (a short one, I promise).

This week’s post is pretty simple; when I saw the various threads going up on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram I thought the opportunity was too good to pass up for this blog. Long story short, someone has been going around to the various social media platforms and asking men to give their BEST (and most honest) relationship advice. The answers were actually pretty good and I thought I’d take a collection of some of the better ones and post them here for my wifeys & gents to digest and discuss.

For this instance, the advice is geared toward women and heterosexual relationships. HOWEVER, I think that much of it can be applied to any and everyone. Good advice is good advice, right? Here’s what they had to say:

When he shows you who he is, believe him. With men, we are creatures of action and not words. Believe all of what you see and half of what you hear.

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Date nights & Bae-cations should be often, especially if you have kids.

Talk to each other after arguments (be honest) keep the issues off social media and don’t run to family/friends after every disagreement.

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If he’s giving you mixed signals take it at face value. You don’t need mixed you need reassurance.

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If a man wants you, you will know. Don’t fall for the words if there is no action.

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If your man’s energy changes and he isn’t as caring or attentive as before, please be the QUEEN that you are and move on. You don’t have time for a man who is inconsistent. Don’t give him the benefit of the doubt either. 90% of the time another woman is the reason he’s changing anyway.

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Don’t be afraid to check in on him. You don’t always have to wait for the man to text first. Make it clear what you like and don’t like, don’t expect him to read your mind.

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1) Communicate, but remember your words have weight

2) The relationship is a part of your life, not your whole life

3) Love yourself first.

4) if you’re in it for the long haul, the only competition you should have is who plans the better date nights 😉

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Your friends should NEVER be treating you better/hyping you up more than the man you are dating.

Also, men cannot be “stolen”. If they cheat or hook up with someone else it is because they wanted to.

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Find a man who is already the man you WANT, not the one you think he can be. Stop breaking your back trying to change us. We change when it’s our time. Half the time you do the work and the next woman reaps all the benefits. This is NOT your fault, but you shouldn’t have to go through it regardless. Find someone who IS, don’t date potential.

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Men are stupid, ok? Just tell us what you need. Be straight up with us and let us know what you expect. Don’t settle for less than what you know you deserve and what you know we are capable of. Check us if we start slipping.

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Just hear us out sometimes. Try to understand things from our point of view. Understand the way we think and move. We don’t all operate the same way. Let us know if we hurt you, don’t bottle it up.

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Simple shit: if he’s not doing it then you aren’t the one. Stop letting men condition you for abuse. If you point out a behavior or a problem, if you tell him that something he said or did has hurt you and his response to argue, get defensive, or ignore you, cut him off! It’s over. Be done and move onto the next.

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If it costs you your peace, it isn’t worth it.

Your relationship is your relationship, don’t share all the personal stuff with your friends.

Love doesn’t matter if you don’t have trust. If he breaks your trust and you can’t get it back, move on.

Communication is key. Give it and expect it from him.

Don’t credit your new man with the pain of your last relationship. If you’re going to give him a chance do so with an open heart.

Know that you might have to “unlearn” some things in order to get the love you deserve.

Ask plenty of questions of the first date. Don’t play games!

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For my LGBTQ+ readers, I would LOVE to hear any advice you’d like to share that might be better or different than what the men provided here. Would you say this applies to all relationships and genders?

Do you think this is good advice? What would you add? Is there anything you disagree with?

Unfortunately, a lot of the men in the comments/responses were being dicks about it, I thought about including a few of those responses…but 2020 is hard enough without having you roll our eyes about men and the trash they can bring! Still, some of the guys on these platforms seemed like they really wanted to help. That made me feel good! ❤ ❤ ❤

Please let me know what you think! I love hearing from you guys and I’ve missed you so much!

Maternity leave from my job is in full effect, so expect to hear from me again VERY soon (like sooner than 12 days, I swear)

Until next time,

Carry on wifeys & gents!

Love,

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Be a lamb and tell your friends….

The little lamb is so proud of you for sharing good advice with your homies! ❤

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